I hate being on pills. There used to be a time when I didn’t mind it, but now I associate medication with old age and it saddens me and makes me feel like a failure. About three weeks ago I had a medical situation and my doctor sent me for blood work and some other stuff. It came back with my cholesterol levels as being too high and my blood pressure was through the roof. So now I am on blood pressure medication and a statin. The blood pressure medication makes me tired and when I went back for a check up after taking the pills, she did see an improvement so she said I could take half a tablet for the blood pressure. I am still on the hook for the statin until I have more blood work in three months and lose the weight. Truthfully I haven’t been doing much to lose the weight. Bicycling season is coming up so I figure I can eat the same things and bicycle and should be fine. It happened last season I hope it will happen again. I don’t eat bad stuff, I just eat too much of it, and the regular exercise was enough to drop the weight so I am counting on that again.
I just turned 57. I don’t’ look 57 and I am sure I don’t act 57 and further more I don’t feel 57. My concept of 57 is really based on my mother at that age and the celebrities I grew up watching in movies and on TV. Like Cher and Goldie Hawn, and Sophia Loren. They don’t look their age but it’s because of plastic surgery and makeup and air brushing. I know I won’t be able to maintain my youthful appearance forever and I am noticing fine lines where I haven’t seen them before. My skin has that old lady appearance that I see on my mother and that saddens me more than anything. There have been changes that I don’t like having to wear my reading glasses more and more. Sure I really don’t mind the absence of menses, but I hate the hot flashes. So there are tradeoffs.
Yesterday I went to an event celebrating Women’s History. The woman leading the event was a friend of mine and when I walked in she was singing along with a song about hot flashes. We all laugh about them but they are not comfortable; not comfortable at all. But it is one of those things that we all have to go through, I suppose. That is if you want to take pills for it. More pills. We have become a nation of pill takers and the older I get the more annoyed by that I become. I don’t want to be fixed by a pill; I just want to be fixed. So I will continue to take my pills like a good girl, and continue to eat right and exercise and hopefully soon I will be able to get off this medication and strive for living life naturally again.