Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Honor Thy Mother

I know the commandments say to “honor they mother and father”, but in some cases that is rather difficult.  I know my mother means well, but she has an annoying my-way-or-the-highway way about her that rubs me wrong.  I guess she did well raising me.  I have a fairly good work ethic, I don’t lie or cheat, or steal, or any of that other stuff, and I appreciate education and art.  For those things I am grateful for her teachings and her guidance.  But her manner, especially as she ages, is quite another matter.

Last night, I saw an old episode of Law and Order which had a character that so typified my mother I thought it was she they wrote the part about.  The actress played the part of a grandmother who was so driven to do things right that she drove her daughter-in-law to commit murder to get the grandchild into an exclusive pre-school.  The grandmother was nasty, downright nasty, and haughty when she spoke to the police complaining that her son married down and that her daughter-in-law tricked him into marrying her.  The mannerism of the actress was my mother down to a T.  I wish I could have taken a snippet of the episode and sent it to her so that she could see what others see about her.

They say you become your parents, especially when you are a parent.  I certainly hope that I don’t get to be that way, although at times I hear my mother coming out of me when I speak to my son, and it scares me.  I don’t want to become that way.  I don’t want to have those around me fear to anger me or go away thinking that I am a world class bitch.  I want to age gracefully and be thought of as a person with kindness and humility.  I suppose that it will take work and it is so worth it.  

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